Starting a relationship can be nerve-wracking. You've met this person and you really like them, but you don't want to mess it up! Here's our top 5 tips for a healthy relationship.
1. Talk
My boyfriend and I talk about everything, from the most mundane to the most serious topics, we will cover them all- multiple times. Being able to be completely open with someone is so important to a relationship.
It takes time to get to know someone and for trust to be built up but don't worry, you'll get there.
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A page from my diary before we were dating,
the underline was added after he asked me out |
2. Encourage each other
Your significant other is one of those elite few who you trust to have your back, no matter what. So you need someone who will tell you (lovingly!) when you're wrong, be there for you on the bad days and encourage you to achieve your dreams- wanting you to reach them as badly as you do!
When we started dating we were still going through the process of applying to universities and it was tempting to move close to each other. However, we both have career ambitions that are really important to us and we decided to choose our universities based on the courses, rather than each other. Which is how we ended up living 189 miles away from each other! It's tough but we both love our courses and we're gaining really important life experiences we might not have if we stuck together.
3. Make time for each other
It can be so difficult to make time for each other in between school, work and family- particularly if, like me, you're in a long distance relationship! Sometimes it can feel like you go through the whole day just catching each other, for long enough to say hi, before you're both rushing off again.
This can really wear you down so why not arrange a date once a week, it doesn't have to be expensive or spectacular- maybe a quick coffee together in a lunch break, or marathon a TV series one night? (We went for a candle-lit dinner of nachos and pastries in front of Game of Thrones).
If you can't always catch each other find a decent app, like Facetime or LINE and call each other before bed for a quiet catch up of how your day was. It might not seem like much, but you really notice the difference when you don't.
4. Be silly
Have tickle fights, wash up together and dollop soap suds in their hair, have a Disney sing along at 3 in the morning. I think everyone can get a little too hung up on being 'cool' sometimes that they forget to let their hair down and just have fun.
And laughter is good for you, it can reduce stress and anxiety, lower your blood pressure and can even
reduce pain!
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He was taking part in the Santa Run where all the competitors
dress up as Santa, obviously I demanded a picture... |
5. Most importantly: be you
The morning of my first date I was in chaos. Whilst running round the house ironing my clothes and trying to tame my hair into something that looked socially acceptable, I was rattling off my worries to my mum.
What if he doesn't like me! Does this look okay? I don't want to look weird? Should I go for casual or slightly dressy? What if he doesn't even want to be my friend any more?
And my Mum stopped me and said something that has stuck with me ever since. She said:
"If he doesn't like you for who you are, then he's not right for you and he's not the person you thought he was"
Please lovelies, don't settle for someone who doesn't love who you truly are. I don't just mean the person you'd like people to see. I mean the person who sleeps with a light on because they're scared of the dark, the person who will kill anybody who gets between them and a morning coffee, the person who cries when someone raises their voice. Find that person who loves those hidden parts of you that make you who you are.
You are an amazing person and you deserve somebody who sees that and loves that!
Hope you found this post helpful!
Are you lovelies in relationships? We'd love to hear about them!
Ps. Ayah is fabulously single and will someday meet someone as equally crazy as she is!
Confidence.
Light.
Happiness.
Love,
Kimmy, Embrace the Light xxx
